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 Post subject: The Balance
PostPosted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 10:21 pm 
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(I was typing this as a reply, but the thread was deleted. Oh well, I think this is worth reading.)

I feel a lot of people in MMO don't want to break the silence of what their RL is.

Funny enough, I never talk to people in RL about FFXI. My gf will ask me questions, but I'll just answer them briefly as I know she's not into video games. I just know talking about FFXI is a lot to talk about and most people won't be interested enough to hear the whole story...or world... that is FFXI.

Still, I think we have to have a balance here. RL has it's responsibilities. Jobs, children, loved ones, and even endeavors outside of the gaming world such as art, sports, writing, music, etc etc all need their time.

Again still, how can we say FFXI is not an endeavor? I think the video game world over the last 15 years has proven that it's a serious hobby for some and there could be an argument made for it leading to creative expression. Too many videos on Youtube of music and art work made based on FFXI. The community of FFXI takes their game seriously, as serious as an professional who wants to perfect his craft.

Both sides seem valid, as long as they are in balance. We should respect both sides. I think we should understand if RL has the upper hand. If I had a baby, I think I would have a hard time getting to my computer. I might even have a hard time sending a message. Computer games don't necessarily allow easy access to hanging out with a baby. Even in RL I have older friends who have babies and are on a set time schedule. "I'd love to travel the world with you, but I have this family..."

This isn't a message though to say that the FFXI LS isn't important. If I couldn't make it to an event, I would hope to message. I'd feel tied up if stuck in traffic, not being able to call anyone on my phone, to say I'll be late to the event. Everyone matters, so I would hope to keep my promises. Missing a FFXI event with people I call my true friends without a message would be like snubbing someone if I made a date with them.

Real friends understand each others problems and communicate it out to them personally. If you can't stand who a person is, then yes I think it's time to move on and do your own thing, but lets not forget the balance of what we do in and outside of FFXI.

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 Post subject: Re: The Balance
PostPosted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 10:46 pm 
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Soloable by "most" jobs.
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Well spoken Aithan. But that being said, snubbing someone in game is the same as snubbing someone in real life. We're all people, just interacting in different ways. If something comes up in real life and you end up ditching out on people who took the time out of their day to play this game with you, that's fine, but explain the situation and be apologetic for leaving them hanging.

Coming into a situation without a sorry or an explanation and then getting pissed off about it when a decision has to be made to move forward without them for the sake of the other 5 people in a static who are relying on you to help them acheive their goals, is selfish and hypocritical.

Real life happens, but you have to be respectful to those who you are ditching when real life does happen. Without an explanation, you are nothing more than a douche, and that's the truth of the matter. With an explanation and/or an apology, I don't think anyone will not understand one's plight.

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 Post subject: Re: The Balance
PostPosted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:24 am 
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Joined: Mon Oct 06, 2008 9:49 am
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RDMFeather wrote:
The community of FFXI takes their game seriously, as serious as an professional who wants to perfect his craft.


Sometimes I'm more guilty of this than I would like to admit. I'm starting to wonder if I'm OCD or something, because I'm always tinkering with something related to gear, macros, x-hit builds, damage tiers, etc etc. Always trying to perfect them. For me though, those things are some of the more fun aspects of this game, aside from the obvious social aspect.

In regards to missing planned events. Honestly, in 90% of the cases when someone can't make it to a special event or a previously planned meeting, it's easy to squeeze in 20 seconds to leave a message for folks and let them know you can't make it or will be late etc. For the other 10% which I would label as "dire emergencies", I would think that friends would understand, provided you took the time to explain.

I agree that brushing someone off in this game is equal to brushing someone off in real life, there are real people behind the pixels after all, and I think that is something that is forgotten all too often.


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 Post subject: Re: The Balance
PostPosted: Mon May 04, 2009 9:12 am 
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I almost think you need to ignore reality and responsibility in order to play this game, maybe games in general. There's always something 'better' you could be doing with your time, something that forwards your status/health as a member of society. But on a personal happiness level games are great, yard work and exercise certainly don't keep depression away for me like ffxi does, that is unless you realize what you've been neglecting IRL.

Not sure what I'm getting at, in terms of this topic I could ALWAYS come up with an excuse as to why I couldn't attend an event, there was always something I needed to do having a house and kids.. HOWEVER if that event was going to make me happy and give me something I wanted that stuff i 'had to' do could be rethought, broken down, and well in the end I could find a way not to do it. That's bad because I wasn't keeping the house clean and all that responsible stuff (and my wife would sometimes get angry), but that's good because I was way happier killing bahamut than doing dishes like I have to do every stinking day anyways.

It's like my boss, he's always cleaning and taking care of responsibilities, always trying to keep ahead of a life of disorder. But he's so obsessed with taking care of business that when things are all cleaned up he gets antsy and depressed, he doesn't know how to relax and have fun because he's been so focused on working and never thinking of anything else. He lives for the work and order, it's pretty much a pointless life.

So maybe that's the balance, figuring out how much of reality you can ignore to boost your ffxi happiness to it's optimum level, without reality falling so low that you lose your job and place to live, along with friends/family/etc.

Heh reading that it sounds bad, Yeah I'm a game addict.. but after like 25 years of being excited and happy every time I received a new game, there's no way out.

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